Once people understand the fear behind disclosure, the next natural question is: “So… when do I actually bring it up?”

Most daters ask this about things with emotional or practical significance.

Many daters hesitate before sharing something personal — divorce, kids, chronic illness, or anything with a complicated impact. We want to communicate openly and also protect the connection. This tension makes disclosure feel more daunting than it needs to be.

Winging it in dating can feel spontaneous and fun, but it often leads to mismatched connections. To answer, “So, what’re you looking for?” confidently, it helps to unpack what you truly want and what you're ready to share.